The acquired taste of failure

I didn’t get the job at work today – the news of which I found surprisingly disappointing, and I’ve been sniffling around the house all morning trying to decide which part of the experience I’m most upset about.  I think I’ve identified it: internal recruitments are so horrendously awful, that the only reason you put yourself through them is because you have a significantly higher chance of actually getting the job.  Except when, for some reason, you don’t.

When you combine this with my evolving pattern of coming in 2nd for jobs, it can make it really difficult.  If, you do everything right, and you still end up constantly coming 2nd – how long do you have to keep trying?

My wonderful friend Jean, no stranger to job interview disappointment herself, sent me the above greeting card to cheer me up.  While irrevently irrelevant, it is also a reminder, that at least things could be worse – a personal jilting almost always outweighs a professional jilting.

Jean and I also have the interesting history of being failed McGill Daily editors while at university.  While we joke that this was due to our reluctance to sleep with other editors during our tenure there, I believe for both us, our failure to sustain our posts was about slightly more complicated interpersonal conflicts than we like to let on.  Although humiliating at the time, my removal from the daily constituted my first real taste of FAILURE, an old friend I’m hanging out with today.

Being a life-long over achiever, I had relatively few experiences with failure before this time.  I got the grades I wanted, the jobs I wanted, went to the university I wanted, and so on.  I had never had an academic or professional humiliation, and although it was delayed some, I sure am glad it happened when it did – perservering in the extremely competitive fields of journalism, international development, television or the like, in one of the most competitive places in the world, means you gotta get used to it.

And at least I’m nothing compared to this guy.

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